Recent Blog Entries

Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Commentary #228: Doctor Who – Resolution
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 14 Apr 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, driven, in front of 2019’s Doctor Who episode ‘Resolution’, and spout our usual nonsense! Aaron knows how to stall the plot, Lin is being taken for a ride and the Doctor has some serious skids. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #312: Wigs and the Rani
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 07 Apr 2019 08:15

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review the Sylvester McCoy’s debut Doctor Who story Time and the Rani, discuss the Sounds of Thunder audio Annual 2019, celebrate Fake Keith’s birthday, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #227: Doctor Who – Dimensions in Time
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 31 Mar 2019 13:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, baffled, in front of 1993’s Doctor Who 30th anniversary story ‘Dimensions in Time’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is randomly swapping bodies, companions are coming and going and the Rani wants to visit the set of EastEnders. But enough of their problems, […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #311: An Earthly Marvel
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 24 Mar 2019 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn review the Big Finish Doctor Who stories An Earthly Child and Relative Dimensions, discuss the 2019 Captain Marvel film, talk about media we’ve been consuming, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 00:44 — Welcome! 01:35 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #226: Doctor Who – The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 17 Mar 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, forgetting, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos’, and spout our usual nonsense! Paktraki’s memory is entirely plot driven, Graham is out for revenge and Lady Jane from Lovejoy lost her critical thinking millennia ago. But enough […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #310: Regressive Tendencies
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 10 Mar 2019 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Jean Riddler, Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part, take two Classic Doctor Who stories and rewrite them for the modern series, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:11 — Welcome! 02:03 – News: […]

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News of the Universes Alf Roland

By Alf Roland
Chief Pan-Universal Correspondent

Archer Banged Up Jeffrey and Jonathan Archer

Time travelling Starfleet moralist, Captain Jonathan Archer, has been duped by disgraced former Tory, 'Lord' Jeffrey Archer, into taking his place in prison.

Captain Archer's part in the Temporal War now looks at an end after a fateful meeting between himself and possible ancestor Jeffrey Archer. The British novelist, Tory activist and convicted purgurist somehow convinced the gullible Starfleet Captain into believing his two cell mates were enemy agents in the time war.

STUNNED
Captain Archer further compounded his error by agreeing to stun the prison guards long enough to swap his uniform for liar Jeffrey Archer's prison garb. Eye witness reports tell of how Captain Archer was then whacked over the side of the head with a fire extinguisher and dumped in Jeffrey's cell.

MUPPET
A rude awakening was in store for Captain Archer, trapped with two ex-kids tv presenters from Rainbow, George and Zippy. The puppet duo were thrown in the slammer earlier this year for the brutal murder of co-star talking bear Bungle, whose pelt they sold to big name fan of the kids tv series Roy Skelton. Partly in reference to the fact that they only have one arm, the twosome, one a pink hippo and the other an orange creature who had a zip sown into his mouth for dubious air deprivation stimulation, are known around the Belmarsh high security prison as the One Armed Bandits.

BUGGERED
Other prisoners have exclusively told the News of the Universes how for the rest of that afternoon all they could hear were echoing cries from Archer's cell, "Ow, Jeffrey!", being repeated over and over. Jonathan Archer is understood not to have left his prison cell since. His two cell mates venture out only long enough to smuggle back food for the three of them. Captain Archer is known to have a history with several aliens, including a female Vulcan and a shape shifting alien of unknown gender. As a senior Starfleet officer Archer has also had extensive training on how to be captured and thrown into dank dungeons. It would appear that any similar knowledge on how to break out has alluded him this time.

FAKED
Various reports are coming in from across the timeline that suggest Jeffrey Archer has convinced the crew of the USS Enterprise (NX-01) that he is a Starfleet captain, perhaps even Jonathan Archer himself, and they are now running amok and dining at the best restaurants throughout time.