Recent Blog Entries

Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Commentary #224: Doctor Who – The Witchfinders
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 17 Feb 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, ducking, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘The Witchfinders’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor gets herself tied up, Yaz has an encounter with a tentacle monster and Ryan has an unwelcome admirer. But enough of their problems, please sit down […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #308: Pearls Before Masters
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 10 Feb 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss their visit to the Doctor Who convention ‘Science of the Time Lords’, listen to Big Finish’s The War Master: Only the Good, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 00:48 — […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #223: Doctor Who – Kerblam!
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 03 Feb 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, unboxing, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘Kerblam!’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is overexcited by the Kerblam Man, Graham’s become a professional scrubber and Twirly has taken up smoking. But enough of their problems, please sit down with us […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #307: The Irksome Doctors
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 27 Jan 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn debate each Doctor’s more irritating traits, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:09 — Welcome! 01:50 – News: 01:58 — Doctor Who: When the War Master Met the Eighth Doctor. 03:27 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #222: Doctor Who – Demons of the Punjab
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 20 Jan 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, fated, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘Demons of the Punjab’, and spout our usual nonsense! Yaz wants to interfere with her grandmother, Prem has his card marked and the Doctor walks away. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #306: Seasonal Ranking
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 13 Jan 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Jean Riddler and Keith Dunn discuss the 2019 Doctor Who New Year’s Special, rank the eleven ‘New Who’ Doctor Who series, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:40 — Welcome! 02:14 – News: 02:25 — […]

Buccaneer Chronicles

The Buccaneer Chronicles:
Vampire Mutations

By Karen Dunn (Despite Interference by Keith Dunn, Andy Simpkins, Adam J Purcell and Tony Gallichan)


Chapter Fourteen - The Computer

 

“Password”

"I have seen Macfadyan argue with the Ship when it fails to live up to his expectations. I have seen Captain Curtis thump the food machine when it serves him egg salad instead of the requested tea and crumpets. I have seen Blanche glare at the console when it beeps at her and makes her jump. I have seen all these things and heard them all say the same thing with varying degrees of venom but this is the first time I have ever understood what 'bloody machine' means.”

* You are familiar with me - a password is unnecessary. *

“Password”

Cre'at sighed and wasted a valuable second meeting the machine's request.

“Greetings, Cre'at”

* Greetings. I require your assistance. *

“Ready.”

* Three point seven two kilometres to the east is a Ship. You must make contact. *

“Done.”

* Excellent. *

“It is a very rude machine.”

* I am aware of this. *

“Why would a construction of such high quality use a term such as 'butt out'?”

* My apologies - Blanche has become fond of American soap operas and some of the terms have corrupted the Ship's vocal systems *

“You should repair it - it is most unbecoming.”

* I shall endeavour to do so. *

“Acceptable.”

* Are you able to access the Ship's defence systems? *

“A password is required.”

Cre'at sighed: * The password is 'fluffy'. *

“In what way?”

* You misunderstand. The password is 'fluffy'. *

“But...”

* Just tell it 'fluffy'! *

“Access granted. You should also repair the password generator. Such misunderstandings could prove troublesome.”

* I am aware of this, also. I shall suggest changes. *

“Also acceptable. Instructions?”

* A forcefield is required. It must cover the area from the Ship to include the town. It must exceed the height of the trees. Maximum strength. *

“Done.”

* Excellent. Maintain the forcefield until otherwise instructed. *

“Naturally.”

* Bloody machine... *

Leaving the Psych-comp to its task, Cre'at left the house and zipped back through the trees towards the town.

***

The Tower

Vampire Mutations: Chapter Fifteen