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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Commentary #219: Doctor Who – Rosa
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 09 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, segregated, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode, ‘Rosa’, and spout our usual nonsense! Ryan is feeling the sting of history, Graham doesn’t want to be there and the Doctor cannot stop this injustice. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #303: The Louboutin Finders
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 02 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss two Doctor Who stories: Kerblam! and The Witchfinders, give a 30 Second Recommendation, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:42 — Welcome! 02:16 – News: 02:26 — Doctor […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #218: Doctor Who – The Ghost Monument
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 25 Nov 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, trekking, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘The Ghost Monument’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is searching for her baby, Ryan is screaming like a little girl and Epzo is sleeping a lot. But enough of their problems, please sit […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #302: A Villain Conundrum?
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 18 Nov 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn discuss two Doctor Who stories: The Tsuranga Conundrum and Demons of the Punjab, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 00:39 — Welcome! 01:50 – News: 01:59 — Doctor Who: Paternoster Gang to be […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #217: Doctor Who – The Woman Who Fell to Earth
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 11 Nov 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, regenerated, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who premiere episode, ‘The Woman Who Fell to Earth’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor cannot remember her own name, Ryan launches a bike and Tim Shaw gets a faceful of salad. But enough of their […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #301: A Whittaker Triple
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 04 Nov 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Jean Riddler and Keith Dunn discuss three Doctor Who stories: The Ghost Monument, Rosa and Arachnids in the UK, play a game, give a 30 Second Recommendation, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:09 — Welcome! 02:31 – […]

Doctor Who Logo

Doctor Who: Song of the Cybermats

By 'John Smith'


 

Chorus
Cybermats come out to-night
Cybermats come one come all:
The Cybermen's edict bids them fight
Cybermats come to the Cyber Cabal.

1.
Cybermats are quick and silver,
Cybermats are rather smart;
Cybermats are weapons that deliver,
and across the floor unseen they dart.
Cybermats have shiny faces,
Cybermats have bright glowing eyes;
they are clockwork killers of inferior races
And wait for the best circumstance to arise.

2.
Cybermats are rather lowly,
Cybermats are not too big;
Cybermats are roly-poly,
They know how to stun and garrotte and gig.
Until the Cyber order they hear
They make their toilette and take their repose:
Cybermats listen with the tiniest ear,
Cybermats watch being keen to dispose.

3.
Cybermats are silver and black,
Cybermats are of moderate size;
Cybermats jump like a jumping-jack,
Cybermats have 40 watt eyes.
They're quiet enough disabling scanners,
They're quiet enough where-ever they stray,
Renewing their ever-so internecine powers
by tapping direct to your solar array.

4.
Cybermats are plastic and light,
Cybermats (as I said) are small;
If it happens to be a stormy night
They will practise a murder or two in the hall.
If it happens the sun is shining bright
You would say there is nothing amiss in the wall:
They are resting and saving themselves to be right
For the Cybermen and the Cyber Cabal.